Emma B’ story

After I had a surgery in 2018, I was on the slow road back to recovery; I still had the port-a-cath in, and the scars were still very much healing, but slowly the memories of being in ICU, the anxiety of the weekly blood tests and oncology appointments, the uncertainty of knowing whether the ‘we got it all’ in the first peritonectomy was indeed a true reality, started to fade, and happy experiences started flooding right in – travel, weekends away, saying ‘yes’ to everything (!), working hard, starting to get my fitness back, and enjoying good times with family, friends and work colleagues started to fill my cup (and diary).

2019 was the year of travel – in addition to domestic trips and unforgettable adventures such as travelling to The Red Centre for a friend’s 50th, we travelled to Italy and Malta and had an incredible European summer. Amongst this I was still adjusting to ‘life post stoma’ and missing a gall bladder which meant that food and wine needed to be considered in close proximity to the loo! We got really good at finding the world’s best hotel lobby bathrooms that’s for sure. My regular CT scans, blood tests and monitoring continued but for the first time in over 12 months the disease wasn’t sitting in our frontal lobes all day every day.

2020 and 2021 of course was the years everyone preferred we didn’t have (COVID) and it was a pretty uneventful year as far as my journey with bowel cancer went. I cannot imagine what it would have been like to be navigating treatment and surgeries during these two years.

Then 2022 happened and that took all of us by enormous surprise. Things were going ok, I was enjoying life – let’s just say a little too much –  indulging in all the areas I shouldn’t and not looking after myself or putting all the right priorities where they should be, and out of nowhere, I had this huge stomach pain one night. I called my oncology nurse in desperation knowing that something wasn’t right and was rushed to emergency.

They told me it was a ruptured ovarian cyst and I thought – oh ok that’s not what I was worried about – but then the same oncology surgeon who conducted my first peritonectomy visits me in pre-op and lets me know he is concerned there may be disease returned but it is impossible to know as there was so much scar tissue. They began preparing me for another peritonectomy and to be honest I was in complete shock. I could not believe that we were back here – for a ruptured cyst!

Needless to say, my worst nightmares came true – I woke up in ICU again with the breathing and feeding tubes in, and to my horror, another ileostomy and stoma bag to contend with. In waking in ICU my oncology surgeon came to visit me and advised me that because the ruptured cyst had done so much damage it was impossible to determine what was or wasn’t suspected disease and they made the emergency call to conduct a hysterectomy, removing a few other organs in the process.

This knocked me completely – I was floored. How can a cyst cause this much damage? Even though I presumed fertility always had the chance of being harder than usual, I at this stage still had a working uterus and regular cycle. Now that option had been completely taken out from underneath us. I was determined to get out of the hospital in less time than I was in three years prior, and I managed to achieve that, along with a two-day ward shutdown due to a COVID outbreak. I was not in a good headspace at all.

Returning home, my recovery was sadly scar tissue I knew all too well. I knew the steps, the process, what to expect. Dealing with so much trauma, sadness and loss in one go, while feeling a shell of myself was honestly awful. My husband – always by my side no matter what – was there, and I to this day still do not know what I deserved to have him be the amazing husband that he was and is to this very day.

As time slowly went on, I was determined to get my physical fitness under control, investing in my mental fitness seeing psychologists, sports and specialist stoma physiotherapists and worked hard to rebuild. It was a slow and complicated process for so many reasons. No one really prepares a young couple for this kind of trauma. It impacts everything in a relationship. It is a testament to my husband and our unbreakable bond that we survived this as many do not.

Beginning to rebuild, and having the stoma reversed (again), I started to get my confidence back and found purpose in giving back to the cancer clinic who treated me joining their Consumer Governance Board (and asked quickly to Chair it), volunteering there and joining as an ambassador to a Foundation. Walking a few kilometres over the past couple of years as part of fundraising and awareness campaigns and in general being thankful in every way. I celebrate each birthday to the fullest, and radiate positivity and good energy always. I believe this, along with investing in your physical and mental health is the only way to move through this survivor journey.

I reached the 5-year remission milestone by 2023 – a cautious milestone I really wasn’t sure about! Hearing the words meant everything to me, and whilst no one can predict the future this was a statistic that I was excited to surpass. Many others do not reach this milestone, and I truly knew I was one of the lucky ones. By 2025, I was booked to have my port-a-cath taken out – the last remnant of my ‘devices’ and a huge milestone in and of itself. Now I am back to pesky blood tests like the average person with nurses trying and failing to find my veins 🙂

I still get the scan-xiety every year when I do my annual CT scan but it’s nothing like what I used to feel. I take nothing for granted, am positive, happy, and looking after myself. I am unbelievably grateful. A little prayer here and there hasn’t hurt either!

As I write this, on the weekend of our 10-year wedding anniversary, we celebrate not only a huge personal and relationship milestone, but with the transfer of one of our embryos to our amazing surrogate. Would you believe in a strike of unbelievable ‘meant-to-be’ luck, our surrogate shares my birthday?! Some things really are meant to be, and we are so excited for our next chapter as happy parents to begin.